Friday Fabulous Faith and Fun!

Our Life with Teenagers

By Beth Holmes

I think it started with the colorful array of pinwheels strategically placed all over the front yard. As the months passed, more “gifts” randomly appeared—ping-pong balls in the mailbox, popsicle sticks spelling out our names on the driveway, and photos of notable religious leaders taped to the garage door are just a few of the surprises we found waiting for us.

I don’t know why this group of teenagers decided to adopt my husband and me, but I’m thankful that they did. Although we don’t have children of our own, we have found that we can influence members of the next generation for Christ by becoming friends with children and teenagers in our church and community.

Friday Nights with the Girls

The typical group on a Friday night consists of the same three girls who you might call the ringleaders. We don’t do anything overly exciting when they show up. We might play a card or board game or make hot chocolate. Sometimes they bring other friends with them, and sometimes they come alone. They almost never call because they know that if we are at home, the door will be open.

All they seem to want from us is our time and friendship, and sometimes a listening ear. We don’t lecture them about their lives, but they know that if they need someone to talk to they can come to us. We have celebrated with them in their victories, and we have dried their tears when they’ve learned that life doesn’t always work out the way they dreamed.

Passing on the Faith

“You then, my son, be strong in the grace that is in Christ Jesus. And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable men who will also be qualified to teach others” (2 Tim. 2:1–2).

When my husband and I were teenagers and young adults, we each had people who were willing to invest themselves in our futures. In my husband’s case, a pastor who saw God’s hand on him mentored him in the ways of the ministry. In my case, my pastor’s wife (and best friend’s mother) taught me what it meant to show hospitality to teenagers.

We are making a deliberate attempt to be this kind of example to the children and teenagers in our circle of influence. Here are some of the things that we have learned:

* You don’t have to have the latest technology or gadgets to fit in with teenagers. All they really want from you is your time and a listening ear.

* You do need to be real and open in order for kids to trust you.Children can spot a fake a mile away, and they won’t care about anything you tell them until you are honest with them. Obviously, some boundaries need to be observed. We don’t share everything in our lives with these teens, but we do try to let them know that we understand when things in their lives aren’t good.

* Youth want you to love them for who they are right now, not for who you want them to become. We let teenagers come into our home, warts and all. They aren’t perfect, but neither are we. We pray that our example will reflect our perfect Lord to them.

* Open the door, put out the welcome mat, spread the word, and they will come. Don’t feel like you need to force them into an organized activity. Just be available.

Inviting children and teens into your life can be an amazing experience, whether or not you have children of your own. They keep you real—and they keep you on your knees in prayer and in the Word as you realize the importance and responsibility of giving them wise counsel.

And most importantly, they keep things fun! So, who’s up for some hot chocolate and a game of Monopoly?

Beth Holmes also has the opportunity to influence teenagers in the chorus at Apollo High School in Owensboro, Kentucky where she plays the piano for the chorus classes.